Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Favre Fetched

Great opportunity to lay out two birds with one stone - Brett Favre (pet peeve) and Brett Favre (sports).

For those who followed my day one post, you may recall I find any talk of Favre's pseudo retirement absolutely maddening. At that point in the sporting universe it was mere speculation - hearsay, an ESPN driven storyline. But now? My dreams of a Favre-free SportsCenter have been crushed. A couple of errant text messages between agents, owners, Favre and reporters and we have Favregate '08 (part II).

(Side note: Can anyone explain why texting gets the shaft in the media these days? When SportsCenter broke the story about Favre communicating with Chris Mortensen via text, the anchor repeated "text message" like Favre sent Mort a moldy tube sock with a message inside. Is the difference between an email and text that substantial? I'm here to stand up for the quick little messages - even if they're getting expensive.)

Back to the land of Cheese Heads and hunting vests. I'm afraid I lack the perspective to understand why, who and how Brett Favre returning to the Packers benefits ANYONE. Sure, he's one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time and still makes plays that people absolutely don't shut up about. BUT this isn't your typical Michael Jordan I want to play for - and own - the Washington Wizards comeback. This is I will hold my old team for $25 million in ransom, return against their wishes with the commissioner's blessing and then (THIS JUST IN) ask for a release-type comeback. What!? Who the hell is your agent AND is he/she/it a carny from the circus with really small hands? Used car salesmen think this deal is shockingly shitty. This is how you want to cap off your 17 year career in Green Bay and thank the fans for their support? The same fans that looked like idiots standing up for you in recent weeks?

What drives all of this? The Wrangler Jeans commercial shoots weren't competitive enough? You miss that "special feeling on Sunday" all the ex NFL'ers talk about? The need for competition, camaraderie and praise? It's called GOLF, Brett. Pick up the sticks, your good ol' boys, and the green's fees.

I can't imagine a bigger slap in the face, Packers fans. He said no to $25 million to sit on the sideline and act busy, said no to playing for you again but said YES to a trade with - get this - any of your division rivals! Just keep all this in mind when Favre once again decides to hang 'em up, take 'em down, call Peter King, text Chris Mortensen and drive me to near violence against my television set.

Please, NFL season, start so you can finish. I've already had enough.

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